piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
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