The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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