No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
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