I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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