hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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