The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
