Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
They took my balls.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
