summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
