I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
What a dumb baby whore.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
