i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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