come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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