So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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