I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize