hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
