it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
These tits shall not be calmed
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
