Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
The best revenge is premature balding
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize
