yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
