I didn't shave. On purpose
I think I died a long time ago.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
