At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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