And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
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