How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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