Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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