dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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