I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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