singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize