I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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