end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
