hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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