My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
