yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
