no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
