Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Randomize
