When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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