is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
