Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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