thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
