Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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