do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
