Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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