I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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