she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
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