It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
