why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize