i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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