i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
