How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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