Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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