We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
