I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
handjob tips. give me some.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
