I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize